The Uncanny X-Men 202 (February 1986)

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Say what one may about Romita’s artwork, but damn if he doesn’t draw the cutest little feet on the Beyonder the last issue? Does Secret Wars II really boil down to penis envy?

Similarly, even with Claremont’s awful writing–he really thought he needed to explain Cerebro to readers in an endless expository thought balloon–he does pack the issue. It’s a chore to get through it, because it’s so lame, but it’s a packed issue. Lots of thoughts, lots of action, lots of dialogue. Though I don’t know where Nightcrawler went. He wasn’t in the big battle scene.

The more I read Secret Wars II and its endless tie-in issues, the more it’s clear what dumb ideas Shooter had for it. Seriously, they could have left the Beyonder alone–he doesn’t really do anything this issue to provoke an attack from the “heroes”–they’ve decided to preemptively strike.

CREDITS

X-Men, I’ve Gone To Kill the Beyonder; writer, Chris Claremont; penciller, John Romita Jr.; inker, Al Williamson; colorist, Glynis Oliver; letterer, Tom Orzechowski; editors, Terry Kavanagh and Ann Nocenti; publisher, Marvel Comics.

Robocop: Mortal Coils 4 (December 1993)

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It’s so, so bad. I mean, I thought since Grant turned in a decent third issue, he might be able to pull off a fourth too, but no. It’s just awful. It’s hard to explain how bad it is without sitting down and reading it because it’s just so unbelievable.

Grant goes for this melodramatic ending and then somehow gives his terribly paced limited series too many endings, the first time showing the inspiring human spirit of Robocop with his girlfriend–sorry, sorry, his female lab technician friend–and then having a comedic finale with the U.S. government about to kill Robocop and him getting saved by some asinine nineties punk criminal guy who he teamed up with for a bit.

It’s so funny Dark Horse let their licensed properties tarnish the image. I mean, I always thought Dark Horse at least tried at this point, but not at all.

CREDITS

Writer, Steven Grant; penciller, Nick Gnazzo; inkers, Bruce Patterson and Dave Ryan; colorist, Pamela Rambo; letterer, Patrick Owsley; editors, Anina Bennett and Bob Cooper; publisher, Dark Horse Comics.

Robocop 14 (April 1991)

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Ok, so this issue of Robocop is a little more interesting than usual–a little more interesting, maybe, than any licensed property comic outside of Dark Horse’s Star Wars ones where there was a “enhanced continuity” or whatever LucasFilm called it–this issue of Robocop features one of the series’ mainstay characters, the sidekick and token black executive, Johnson, going bad.

It means next to nothing to anyone who isn’t a Robocop fan (the third film ignores the Marvel comics continuity, apparently–and unfortunately) but it’s a big deal. It’s also amusing because the opening shot of the character looks like an Obama campaign poster.

Anyway, otherwise there’s a lot of lame stuff, like Robocop’s partner still not getting to him and some evil military cyborg who’s got daddy issues.

Sullivan draws some amazing panels and the inks just fail him, over and over and over again. It’s tragic, really.

CREDITS

Dreams; writer, Simon Furman; penciller, Lee Sullivan; inker, Harry Candelario; colorist, Gregory Wright; letterer, Ken Lopez; editor, Bobbie Chase; publisher, Marvel Comics.

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